© 2026 Vampires Love Garlic by Ashley Chapman. All rights reserved.

33

Buying a World of Happiness

McKenzie

Vampire Rule Number 22:

Although it isn’t really a rule.

Consider it an observation.

Vampires love taking credit for anything they possibly can.

I could afford to host this party without any financial assistance from anyone. Thanks to some solid investments and financial decisions, I’m a regular mogul. Money isn’t a concern with this upcoming nightmare. Marquis knows this as he stands with me staring at the old, decrepit building I’ve bought. It’s quite possible I didn’t wait for my inspectors to get back with me. Actually, it’s likely. All I needed was Heather’s kiss, and this mansion was as good as mine. I’m somewhat regretting it as Marquis whistles through his teeth and tells me every vampire family that would be honored to invest in this stupid party.

“Is the foundation solid at all?” Marquis asks as Heather stands in front of me, staring at the holes in the roof, the falling beams, the cracked colonnades, and the shattered, faded front doors. There are holes in the porch, and almost every shutter of every window is swinging open in the breeze or has massive gaps that make it feel like we’re being watched.

Note to self: Never make decisions while being kissed by Heather.

“It’s sound enough,” I grumble as a particularly strong gust of wind blows several shingles off the roof and a small flock of sparrows flutters out and away from one of the holes.

“What did she do?” Marquis asks, a hint of a laugh in his voice.

“What did who do?”

“You just bought the haunted mansion of the year for the most prosperous, extravagant event of the year without waiting for the inspection reports. So what did Heather do to make you buy it? Damn.” He shakes his head. “Girl must have had you writhing in the bedroom or something.”

There are a lot of comebacks I could make here, but I don’t.

Heather’s walking up the dangerous steps to the front porch. She doesn’t need a key to open the front doors. They swing open for her, sending dust and dead leaves billowing in her direction.

“Watch,” I say, following behind her.

“Watch what? More of the roof cave in? The floor fall out as we walk inside? A family of five generations of massive rats scurry across the entrance room?”

We walk through the front doors into the grand entrance.

It was grand, once.

The house is three stories high. This entrance room rises all the way up to the roof, and it is enormous. Broken windows and sectioned-off rooms run alongside both sides of what must have been a truly magnificent ballroom more than one hundred years ago. There’s an elaborate staircase directly across from the entrance doors, made of mahogany that will shine like diamonds once it’s cleaned up. It rises to the second and third floors.

Heather is standing in the center of the room. There’s a hole in the ceiling high above her, and sunlight is flickering down, sending dust particles drifting like glitter around her and into her hair.

Oh, to see her face.

For a heartbeat, I’m terrified that she thinks this is the worst purchase I could have ever made. I’m worried that my money was wasted for no reason, that she thinks this place is a piece of junk.

There’s a whole colony of brown bats hanging from the second-floor walkways that span out from the stairway. I can hear them chirping, hear their wings fluttering. One of the broken doors slams down, making a horrifying bang echo through the house, and the bats give wing. Up they go, through the holes in the ceiling.

“Kenzie,” Heather whispers, and I swear my heart stops.

The holes, rot, dead vegetation, broken doors, broken glass, mildew on the walls, tarnished wood, cracked colonnades, and now bats. What the hell have I done?

“Yes,” I manage.

She turns, and her radiant smile illuminates the entire room.

“The bats,” she says, pointing at the ceiling. “They’re welcoming you home. Your family’s already here.”

Marquis laughs, that heavy, uncontrolled laugh that usually means trouble, and Heather grins.

“Is this even worth salvaging?” I ask with a sigh.

“Oh, Kenzie, can’t you see it?”

Her hands are clutched over her heart.

“Glass panels in the ceiling.” She waves upward. “To let in the starlight. Crystal chandeliers casting gorgeous prisms of color on the shining wooden floor. We turn the side rooms into bathrooms and a couple of sitting rooms. I’m guessing there are more rooms behind the staircase, hopefully ones we can use for the kitchen. We keep the second and third floor railings and drape them with magnolia garlands and Spanish moss. This.” She’s speaking quickly, and in another few seconds she’ll accuse herself of rambling. “This is the absolute perfect place. We drove in through a gate and down a drive that, once cleaned up, will be bordered by trees. Just stunning. We can hire carriages to take guests from the gate to the house.”

“We put in an elaborate water fountain in the center of the roundabout in front of the front stairs,” Marquis adds. “Hang plants from the porch ceiling and twist winter roses around the colonnades.”

“Yes!” Heather exclaims, clapping her hands. “You can see it!”

“And the price tag,” I manage.

“You have enough vamps wanting to back this project that you probably wouldn’t have to pay anything if you didn’t want to. Everyone wants a piece, Ken. They heard about your little get-together and then your engagement party. They know you have a magic lamp at your disposal,” Marquis says with a chuckle.

Not a magic lamp.

A gorgeous, five-foot-six woman with bright scarlet highlights in her hair, a habit of raising her glasses with her pinkie, and an aversion to high heels.

“When can we start?” Heather asks, walking toward the staircase.

“As soon as possible,” Marquis cuts in for me. “And I wouldn’t try and go up those stairs, baby girl. Wait until I’ve had a construction crew come in. You’d probably drop through the steps. I can smell rot. There’s a lot of damage in here. Some graffiti, too. Let me make the structure sound, and then we’ll go to work on the amazing details and your ideas. I heard something about goats. If you can get your friends to bring those animals out in the next few days, I’ll have landscaping come in, too.”

“Thank you,” she says with a soft smile. “I wouldn’t know where to start with any of that.”

“Tell you what, Sweetheart. You start pulling together all the decorations and party details to your heart’s content. Let’s leave the building and grounds to me. Ken, you come up with who you do and don’t want backing this financially. Pick your friends and enemies. In the meantime, we’ll start with the bones and grounds and work our way up.” Marquis puts a hand on my shoulder. “I think Heather’s imagination is going to make this the event of a lifetime.”

“I’m not going to be able to sleep,” she whispers, so excited her voice is overwhelmed. “I’m going to start as soon as I get home.”

“No. You’ll be starting earlier.” I chuckle. “Your phone’s going to be out as soon as we get into the truck. Keep your key to my basement. I’ll set up a workroom for you upstairs. I’ll get all the paper and pencils you’re going to need. I’ll put you in the spare room next to my office. I’ll prep it for you.”

“You sure you want her in an office?” Marquis murmurs, elbowing me hard in the ribs as she floats across the room, looking at all the smaller rooms, her mind already envisioning bathrooms, closets, and sitting areas. “I’d say you want that woman in your bed.”

“One step at a time,” I elbow him back. “I’m still on cloud nine from a kiss.”

“You know you’re going to have to mark her.” His voice takes on a serious tone.

“There will be hundreds of humans at the event.” Heather squeals as a raccoon ambles out of what must have once been a powder room and hurries to the back of the house. “Everyone will have their assistants with them.”

“And you think she won’t stand out?”

Marquis waves in Heather’s direction as she disappears into one of the side rooms.

“Let’s forget that she’s stunning.” I shoot him a warning look, and he shakes his head. “You know she is Ken, so quit acting like you’re the only man who sees her. She’s got long legs, a slender figure, pretty eyes, and a lovely heart. She’s going to put this all together for you because it’s something she loves doing, and she loves you. I can see it in her eyes every time she looks at you. Her beauty alone will get males looking. Your scent on her is going to get your father salivating.”

“Harold knows Savannah is my territory. I hired her. She’s under my protection.”

“And that’s going to stop him from luring her in? He has no morals, McKenzie. He’s going to see her for her physicality alone and know he wants her. He’s notorious for fast flings. He’ll do what he wants with her and then leave her to you. You need more protection for her than just having her in your domain.”

“I can’t bite her, Marquis. Not her neck. She’s not ready.”

“What do you mean she’s not ready? She has an active imagination. She’s probably already thought up fifty ways a vampire could bite her.” Marquis chuckles. “There are more intimate places, like the inside of her thigh, that you could be drinking from.”

“You know what I think about neck bites. It’s not a quick fangs in and out deal for me.” I fold my arms across my chest. “Harold’s trademark, and every other bloodsucker’s trademark, is biting a human in the throat. They don’t think about what it does to the human.”

“Um… euphoria? Extreme pleasure? If it’s offered and not stolen, it’s the closest to heaven a human’s going to get.”

“Or so we assume.” I sigh, listening as one of the side doors opens and closes. “Think about it, Marquis. A voluntary throat bite means the human is making herself vulnerable. She’s not just offering her neck. She’s offering her heart.”

“Not in any of my experiences. Women just want to know what it feels like to be loved by a vampire.”

“But she isn’t being loved. She’s being tasted. She doesn’t know she’s being marked, and really, the vampire who bites her isn’t thinking about it as a sign of his protection. All she knows is pleasure and then abandonment.”

“I haven’t heard any complaints, Ken.” Marquis shrugs. “And I’ve had my fill.”

“Heather isn’t like other women. She knows what I am, and she hasn’t tempted me to bite her. She’s respected that part of me instead of asking for it. And my feelings for her go well past just wanting to taste her blood. When I drink from her throat, I’ll be giving her all of me, and I believe she’ll give me all of her.”

“You’re talking about sex. Come on, Ken.” Marquis rolls his eyes. “You’re more than experienced in that department.”

“But she’s not. I want her to know how important she is, how loved she is, if I ever bite her. For her, making love is the epitome of surrender. I want her to experience both surrenders at the same time, in a scenario where she feels desired and cherished. Not some quick bang in a bathroom somewhere.”

“You’re such a hopeless romantic.” Marquis laughs. “Damn, she’s hooked you hard.”

“I’ll protect her from Harold as best I can. I’ll let her know what’s at stake. I’ll trust her to decide what she wants to do about it. She knows she’s going to be around hundreds of vampires. I don’t think it’s quite sunk in yet. She’s been too excited. I want her to have peace for now. That conversation can come up in a day or two.”

“McKenzie?” Her voice interrupts the discomfort twisting in my stomach. “The river is almost right behind the house! Once we clean up the back, there will be room for a dance floor and a gorgeous view of the river. This is going to be amazing!”

She comes to me and takes my hands in hers.

“This is going to be glorious. Thank you for letting me help you.”

And suddenly I can’t stop staring at her neck. At how vulnerable and slender it is, at how it would feel beneath my lips, against my tongue, under my fangs.

Damn it.